She flies through the air with the greatest of ease…

Two years ago, my mom bought me and my sister-in-law, Amanda, gift certificates to the NY Trapeze School. I had done trapeze when I was about 6 years old on a family vacation in Club Med. My mom seemed to think the talent I displayed 11 years ago would stay with me. It would have been nice if it turned out that way, but sadly, I did NOT float with any kind of ease.

My first time on the bar, I couldn’t get my knees over so I could hang upside down (yeah, that’s what you’re expected to do on your FIRST try). By the second try, I was able to back flip down onto the net. And on my last try, I did the unthinkable. I let someone catch me and swing me off of my bar! It was an absolutely terrifying experience but I’m glad I got out there and tried it! I am now sitting on the couch exhausted and waiting for this week’s batch of Baked Banana Oat Bars to finish baking.

 

I also did something else today that was absolutely terrifying- I stepped on the scale (cue horror music).

About a year ago, I developed an obsession with weighing myself. I weighed myself every morning and noted every fluctuation. I know now, and even knew then, that the number on the scale can be affected by so many different things (hydration, hormones, sodium intake, inflammation of muscles due to working out, etc., etc.). That didn’t stop me though, and my head was full of numbers; my weight down to the ounce, the amount of calories I consumed, and the amount of calories I burned. Math is not my forte but I was doing calorie calculations all day.  I stayed away from all fats, including the good ones (I actually never ate avocados and tricked myself into thinking I didn’t like them.) This led to binges, which often included over indulging in peanut butter ( I think this was my body’s way of getting the good fats I was depriving it of).

I finally reached a point where I just had to step away from stepping on the scale. I told myself I would only weigh in on Tuesdays. After that first step, it was easier to miss a Tuesday here and there. This fall, due to various things including stress and holidays, I gained a small amount of weight. I then started avoiding the scale all together. When I stepped on in January, I had gained about 7 lbs. I cried and put it away again…until today.

I knew the number would read similar to the one I saw in January, and I was right. This time, however, I am armed with a plan. Moving in with my boyfriend has led my portion sizes to increase, I’ve noticed. I often end up over-full and this is my first step. I need to re-realize that a small amount of good, quality food is all I need to be satisfied. I also haven’t been as consistent at the gym. BY setting goals for myself and blogging about them here (to keep myself accountable!), I hope to lose this extra weight by my 26th birthday (May 14th). I’ll post my meal plans in an effort to see what I’m eating, but I’m also going to try to avoid falling back into such a restrictive pattern of counting calories and lbs. My main focus is eating more fruits and veggies and working out 4x a week. I also have a problem with snacking and sweets. I used to be great about having one small square of organic dark chocolate a night. I’m going back to that and limiting all snacks to a piece of fruit or veggies. I’m always happy to hear suggestions for healthy eating, so feel free to weigh in on my meal plans.

Brunch: Tomato & Avocado sandwich on Ezekial sprouted grain bread with Dijon.

Lunch Snack: 3 Suzies Brown Rice Cakes (I’m obsessed with rice cakes) and 1 Banana Baked Oat Bar

Dinner: 1 mashed sweet potato and Tomato/Cucumber Salad (tossed with red wine vinegar)

Dessert: Greek Yogurt with frozen dark cherries

 

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